The book “Thick Black Theory” talks about developing skills and techniques in speaking and persuading people. Different stories were tackled to demonstrate how one should deliver depending on the situation. I’m not a good speaker and this book does help a lot in reflecting on ways how to converse with people.
It helps to stand back and try to understand where the other person is coming from before speaking. We must remind ourselves that every person has his pride that could get hurt if you weren’t careful and also some people cling on to their pride despite the facts already laid out to them. At this point, according to the author, it would be nice to find another entryway to prevent being denied of the opportunity to elaborate and get no chance at all of convincing the person.
This book also pointed about the ability to say no to people. It isn’t always that you can comply with the requests of all the people who need something. It is good to practice saying no especially people in positions to prevent being stuck in the middle or plunging deeper to the pit (as in doing favors and receiving bribery). There are times that we can’t say no to people like our family or friends, but the author tells us that we can stir away from a request without hurting the other person and not endangering ourselves at the same time. We just have to be creative and sincere in telling the people that we can’t offer help this time; it would be beneficial also to present someone in place of yourself in order to let them feel that you had their best interests at heart and they’ll be in good hands in the person you recommended.
Generally, we should not be expectant that we can persuade the people right away, but try to understand, spend time and effort to let them see your side, not being judgmental to their views or holding grudges to what they can’t seem to see. It is important to build trust and rapport to the people you are persuading which would increase the chances of them listening to you. I really hope I can apply what I read. It’s really difficult to make others see a different picture from what they already see.
On a side note, something related to my previous entry:
One day, my sister had a fire drill at her office. Everyone was asked to evacuate through the fire exit. There are policemen in their building and they didn’t even offer to let the others go down first but they all scrambled down the stairs. I guess, it really is hard to feel safe around police enforcers. We can’t help but think, it it is a real emergency, they’d probably be faster out of the building than they were then.